Oh Gaga

A few weeks ago, Gaga released the video for her song "Telephone," featuring Beyonce.

The video certainly caused commotion. It dazzles viewers with Gaga dancing in a thong, Gaga wearing crazy outfits, a horrendous acting performance by Beyonce, a mannish lesbian kiss, and more poison-induced murder. Well, don't take my word for it, watch this clusterfuck for yourself.



So the video received very mixed reviews, but for the most part, people didn't like it. And for good reasons. My blog of choice, Jezebel, said of the video, ""Telephone" is disjointed, self-indulgent, with jumbled, random references, poor pacing, wince-inducing acting and a strange, pro-woman, anti-man message. Oh, and it's ten fucking minutes long." That sums it up well.

The two biggest complaints I have about the video is the copious use of product placement (likely overused for the sake of irony) and the entire lack of connection to the subject of the song. It's dumb enough that we're forced to keep our eyes lingering on Virgin Mobile, Miracle Whip, Wonderbread and Polaroid labels. But for God's sake, the song is a club banger! It's a brand new take on feminine fun and empowerment as Gaga and Beyonce sing about not answering their man's call if they're dancing. And nevermind the goddamn PussyWagon. Stupid Tarantino, why do you have to disappoint me?


However, the mass murder sequence was delightful, as was the patriotic dance orgy at the very end. All we want is to see the two bitches dance, after all. And I'll add the Beyonce is just more gorgeous each time I see her, so oogling her get-ups and hair styles is almost enough for me.

Anyway, here's a completely different take on the song, a cutesy cover by the duo Pomplemoose.
It's quite good!



I was also unfortunate enough to come across the worst song I've ever heard, a cover of "Bad Romance" by a band called The Demonstration. The video is severely awful to boot. Brace yourself, this is about to get ugly. I'm serious, turn your speakers down.



I'm ALL about melodic death metal, but this is really, really bad. And so are the skanky chicks. Ugh. I'm actually really sorry I made someone watch that. But we need to know what we're up against.